The Lord is Sovereign and His Timing is Perfect

"Never undo in doubt a decision made in faith."- Dr. Jill Jones

My sweet and dear professor wrote this phrase to me in an email just before she died this summer. She was a living testament of the truth within these words. As I plug along in my journey to South Asia; I am reminded of these words each and every day. The choices that God has called me to make and has sweetly ordained the path for, I am not to undo in doubt. But rather walk forward in faith and run hard after the vision He has given.

This week I quickly began to unravel the decision that the Lord has led and called me to. As fears began to creep in and the weight of the world fell heavy upon my shoulders I undid in doubt. There are times in my life that the Lord's hand is heavy on my life. I desire Him with every fiber of my being. It is easy to see the Lord working and I wake up and can't wait to spend time in the Word. I fall asleep and wake up talking to my Savior. (I even find myself talking to Him in my car and while I get ready in the morning- sometimes it I scare even myself!) These times are filled with conscious joy and contentment. Then in an instant, its gone. It feels like I have blinders on. I have to discipline myself to wake up and spend time with my sweet Savior, push through each day and praise Him at the end of it. I feel alone and lonely. This week... has been the latter. A week where I am continuously reminded of my sin nature and I have to continuously discipline my body. However, in the midst of my week and resorting back to my own pride and taking the lead of my life back into my own hands. In the middle of that kind of week-The Lord sent me a reminder. As I began to worry about the money of getting to South Asia and my own inadequacy. I was stopped in my tracks and reminded that He is Sovereign and His timing is Perfect!

In the words of my roommates- Here is what had happened-As I got home yesterday, slightly discouraged and the journey seeming so far away. I was brought to my knees in humility as I was reminded by the verse written on my wall.

Isaiah 55:9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts says the Lord. For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it."

It is not about me! Its not about how I think I am going to get there. He has already ordained the way and moved in the hearts of his people long before I know or will know. Within moments of putting my hands in the air and giving the pathway back to the Lord, I noticed an envelope on our kitchen table. (Its funny how He always brings us to the point of repentance before He shows us how He has worked.) The envelope contained a card from a girl I had met at a conference for Liberty Students that had committed to long term missions after graduation... which I might add had been a huge blessing! Anyway, It was a note of encouragement and my first check towards my trip! What a blessing! I sat staring at the card and kept saying- God is so good!! See, this card was sent at the beginning of the week, before I had even come to the point of repentance. Before I even began to worry and take back control- the Lord had already prepared that moment. The moment that because He is God and I am not- He knew would be a day of weakness and in need of desperate reminding to continue on and keep fighting! God used this girl-which I might add must have been a HUGE sacrifice for her! to bless me... Oh what a Good God we serve!

the Lord is Sovereign and His timing is Perfect!!

In His Grip!