Friday, January 27, 2012

Faith without works

It always amazes me of the power that is found when you sit before the throne of our King. No matter the turmoil that you feel or the distress that the world suffers around us there is true peace when kneeling before our Lord. As beautiful as this time is, I was reminded today of the power of our works. We cannot consistently remain in our quiet times with the Lord; at last we must get off our knees and do the work he has laid out before us. But oh how sweet and sustaining those moments are. It is the moments at his feet that give us the strength to stand up in the raging sea and declare His Glory with our works.


Matt 5:14-16
"You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.
ESV

James 2:18-21
But someone will say, "You have faith and I have works." Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works. 19 You believe that God is one; you do well. Even the demons believe—and shudder! 20 Do you want to be shown, you foolish person, that faith apart from works is useless?
ESV

Through our works the power and Glory of our God is revealed. Our faith is useless without the acting out of our faith. Do my works declare the God of mercy, grace, love, kindness, joy, peace, and power. The works that I do, declare who my God is... it is the proof of where my faith lies. I am far from a pure declaration of our Glorious God but how I pray that He will use me to bring himself glory. Each morning as I get off my knees may the Lord use the quiet to sustain me as He works in and through me in the midst of the raging the world. Oh my King be glorified!

Friday, January 13, 2012

Christmas....


It has been so long since I have blogged. Mostly because every time I look at my computer screen, I think, where do I begin? There are about 15 half started blog posts of the last month and a half. I thought that being here I would be even more inspired to write, but most of the time I simply feel at a loss of words to explain this vastly different world. All that to say, I have been a very bad blogger. But here goes the last few weeks.

I spent my first Christmas away from home. In some ways it was harder than expected and other ways easier. God was abundantly gracious as He always is and provided me with dear friends. We worked hard to carry on all of our family traditions here in South Asia. We did everything from Christmas movies, hot chocolate, matching pajamas, sleeping under the Christmas tree, making Christmas breakfast, stuffing stockings, and wrapping presents. Among our traditional moments we took part in the national traditions of Christmas as well including visiting homes on Christmas and going to church on Christmas day. I had a Christmas party for my 9th grade students. We had a blast and I had the chance to talk about the true meaning of Christmas.


There is something in being away from home that really makes you stop and think about the true purpose and meaning of Christmas. Without Christmas lights, Christmas music, snow, the hustle and bustle, the Christmas greetings, family, home, or the entire Christmas atmosphere; I felt that I had to strive harder to enjoy the Christmas season. For the first time I thought of the unromanticized version of the Christmas story. The fact that Mary probably felt lonely and scared. Her family wasn't with her, she probably barely new her new husband Joseph, she had just traveled hundreds of miles to Bethlehem. And I wonder if she wondered... where is God in the midst of this? Where is he? She stepped out in obedience to His will and yet everyone turned on her, she was alone with Joseph, and she was delivering in a manger. But God was there, right there with her. Never leaving or forsaking her; using her to deliver the Savior of the world. Oh how I pray that I would never forget the true purpose of Christmas. For the Son of God to come to this earth and live a perfect and blameless life. Fighting and conquering sin and temptation so that He could die on the cross perfect, taking on the sins of this world. Conquering death so that I might have a relationship with the father, be sanctified by the Holy Spirit and spend eternity singing His Glorious praises.





Sunday, November 20, 2011

He has heard my voice

Psalm 116 : 1-2

I love the LORD, because he has heard

my voice and my please for mercy.

Because he inclined his ear to me,

therefore I will call on him as long as I live

8-9

For you have delivered my soul from death,

my eyes from tears,

my feet from stumbling;

I will walk before the Lord

in the land of the living.

15-19

Precious in the sight of the Lord

is the death of his saints.

O Lord, I am your servant;

I am your servant, the son of your maidservant.

You have loosed my bonds.

I will offer to you the sacrifice of thanksgiving

and call on the name of the Lord.

I will pay my vows to the Lord

in the presence of all his people,

in the courts of the house of the Lord,

in your midst, O Jerusalem.

Praise the Lord!


A year ago, I layed wide awake in my bed thinking about what this night would be like. The night before Thanksgiving. How far away from home I would be. I couldn't fully imagine it and yet somehow I had almost this melodramatic idea of the sacrifice it would be. While I miss my family with all of my heart, God is my Sustainer. He has prepared my heart for this day and in it I find peace and joy. It seems strange that 1 year later on the same night I would find myself wide awake. I am thankful for the past year. The testing of faith and trust. The joy of fulfilled prayers and longings. The peacefulness of this night, where I can praise God for knowing him better tonight than I did 1 year ago. For having gained just a glimpse of understanding and falling more in love with my King.


I "stumbled" upon this psalm the other day while I was reading in my journal of the year and a half journey of coming here. As I read the psalm, tears welled up in my eyes because I could not have expressed the journey the Lord has brought me on any clearer! God is so good! When I first arrived in this new place, there were so many new changes! I knew that this where God had me, there was no question about that! But how could I do this? The presence of the Lord seemed so far away and I guess I had thought that because I was stepping out in obedience that I would know his presence like never before. That I would somehow magically know him better. But as I looked around me I had comfort and peace but also an overwhelming feeling of "what have I gotten myself into!" I cried out before the LORD to have mercy on me! To give me peace and understanding! Day after day as I went before my King and Ordainer I grew in peace. He inclined his ear to me.


He is my constant! He is my provider! He is my sustainer! He is my everything! Looking back, I can declare with full confidence that He is everything and He is enough! He saved my very soul from the clutches of hell, chose me and molded me into his child. As he grows and sustains me he keeps me close when life is painful. He keeps my feet on the path and keeps me close by to keep me from stumbling. He gives me the strength and confidence in Him to carry on each day and declare His Glory! Because of all that I have seen I will walk before my Lord in trust having seen his faithfulness!


Saturday, October 8, 2011

Filled to Remember





These last few weeks have been so filled it is hard to keep up on it all. We had a week off school for Durga Puja which is a Hindu holiday. During that week we left the city for a week in Malumghat. Which is 50 miles away but takes about 4 hours to get there. It sits right outside of a village and has a hospital where part of our team treats patients 24/7. It was a great week of rest and enjoyment with the rest of our team. It was a g
reat time of encouragement and fellowship all being together. It was also so informative to see all the extra tasks and jobs that our team has taken on. Praise the Lord for such dedicated people! Most of these people are doing the work of 4-5 people. They work hard and all to the Glory of God!

The week ended with the greatest experience since I have been in South Asia. I slept over an orphanage with a few other girls. There are 12 kids in the home and they are so deeply cherished and loved by their house mom and dad. They don't have much but they are clean, smiling, and joyous. Most importantly, they are developing a true relationship with God and learning the Truth. We all had dinner with many smiles and laughter even
though our language was quite the barrier. We sang songs to our hearts content, songs in our language and theirs, with and without hand motions, and we sang with all of our souls. Oh the joy of worshiping our God together! We played a few games and just enjoyed our evening. I went to sleep after tucking the kids into bed thinking that my heart c
ould not hold much more joy and the love I already had for these precious children couldn't possibly grow deeper but I was so wrong!


Their faith and joy does not match my own but rather far exceeds what little faith I
possess. Their dedication to Christ and their ways are an incredible challenge to my life. The last 24 hours was a true example of having the faith of a child. We woke up at 6am to the c
hildren singing praises and lifting prayers to the
Lord. They had already been up for a 1/2 hour reading their bibles and were now worshiping their father. These are children who wake up at 5:30am so that they can enjoy pure worship of their father before they go to school 6 days a week. How often do I not cherish the worship of my father enough to arise early and sit before his throne.

We surprised them at breakfast with the announcement that we were going to go the local water park! Some of the kids had never been to a pool before and others just didn't know how to swim. Fully clothed (because that's how we do swimming here) we headed off to the water park. We had a blast! We went down water slides, went in a wave pool, a playground pool, and tube slides. Every motherly instinct I have ever had was in me as I wa

tched "my kids" come down the slide into a pool of water they didn't know how to swim in but the joy and smile on their face was absolutely priceless. I couldn't stop smiling and laughing. After several hours at the park we trekked our way back home to a delicious lunch. I didn't want to leave- I am so thankful for such a sweet day. The children ar

e so loved, cherished, and taken care of at the home but when I l
ooked in their eyes or felt their clinging hugs I just wanted to sit there and hold them tightly back; reminding them of the love of their Father. Though their were traces of pain, their faces weren't those of the forgotten or of the pain stricken but sweet faces of the Redeemed trusting their Redeemer.
Through all the fun here is what my heart exploded with:
Faith and joy is not dependent on circumstances or people. It does not depend on what you have or who you know it is purely in the knowledge of God our father. Joy comes from obedience and knowing you are loved and chosen by the Father. As all that is around you changes nothing matters with your eyes fixed on Jesus. He will restore your broken heart and bring joy to your face. Children truly are an example to of faith. Oh to have the faith of a child as all around them crumbles and falls they fix their eyes and desire soly on Jesus trusting Him and His ways. Knowing that He loves them. Knowing that He has chosen them and He will not forsake his chosen.




In His Grip,
Jen

Thursday, September 8, 2011

The first few days





I am here! and all settled in. I have been here for about 5 days and we have already seen the Lord answer so many prayers. Thanks for the prayers in getting us here! After 20 hours on the plane we were exhausted. But it turned out that through some pretty funny and strange circumstances our luggage was untouched and waiting for us on carts when we arrived in the capital city. (Lets just say the funny circumstances included us waiting a very long time at the wrong baggage collection and then running across the airport... as if didn't already attract enough attention being the only foreigners) But God was so good... we had been a little nervous about getting our very heavy baggage of the baggage belt anyway... so instead the Lord went ahead of us and it was waiting for us on the carts. We went through
customs (actually they just waved us through customs) to some very friendly faces holding a sign with our names on it. We had several hours to rest, regroup, and go back to the airport for our last 45 minute trip to our final destination. Our baggage was driven down to meet us at our house the next morning. A huge blessing when you see just how much baggage we had. It was such a huge relief to see our baggage and finally unpack. Not only had our bags gone untouched but everything was in great condition! (which was a huge miracle... considering all the other bags that came off that plane were torn apart and ripped to shreds. The Lord had definitely protected even our luggage.


We have spent the last few days buying new clothes (So much fun!!), taking the clothes to the tailor to be made, unpacking, walking throughout the city, going to school, setting up my classroom, looking at my curriculum, and attending a local meeting! I also ate with my hands for the first time and learned a few words in our new language. It has already been quite the adventure and I am slowly learning to adjust to the sights, sounds, and smells. We met these precious children on the street one of the girls knows them well and they recognized her immediately it was sweet moments in the midst of it all and reminded me of why I am here.


I have been constantly reminded through it all that this journey is not mine so I can trust where I am being led. What a blessing to know that I am not alone and while everything else changes; He does not. He is still faithful. And it reminds me- that is why I am here. Because those all around me don't know the God that I know; his love, mercy, kindness, goodness, faithfulness. They don't know the pure joy of knowing our Father. And I so desperately want them to know. My heart has already begun to break for these needing people.

"For God did not give us a spirit of fear but of power, and love, and a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7

In His Grip,
Jen

Friday, September 2, 2011

Nights of Prayer

Psalm 104: 27-35

These all look to you,
to give them their food in due season.
When you give it to them, they gather it up;
when you open your hand, they are filled with good things.
When you hide your face, they are dismayed;
when you take away their breath, they die
and return to their dust.
When you send forth your Spirit,[c] they are created,
and you renew the face of the ground.

May the glory of the LORD endure forever;
may the LORD rejoice in his works,
who looks on the earth and it trembles,
who touches the mountains and they smoke!
I will sing to the LORD as long as I live;
I will sing praise to my God while I have being.
May my meditation be pleasing to him,
for I rejoice in the LORD.
Let sinners be consumed from the earth,
and let the wicked be no more!
Bless the LORD, O my soul! Praise the LORD!


For the past four years on this very night I would join in Liberty University's all night of prayer. On those nights my prayers would range from restlessness to peace, sinfulness to forgiveness, despair to hope. But the main theme of those prayers would be of brokenness. A prayer that would beg for the brokenness of my heart so that God would strip away and restore. It was four years ago on this very night that I was handed a glow stick. I was told that a glow stick cannot glow until it is broken... then... and only then can it shine brightly to the darkness around. And we... when broken before God... can be restored to purity and given the ability to shine to the darkness around.

Now just four years later... my night of prayer is no longer at Liberty but in the silence of my room. And this time... my night of prayer does not look to four years of college and the changes that will come but instead to two years in South Asia... and all that God will do through a broken and contrite heart. It is on the eve of change that I am reminded of the faithfulness and goodness of God. He has shown himself to be faithful! Bless the Lord oh my soul and remember his loving kindness and grace that has followed all the days of your life! Bless the lord oh my soul with all that is within me bless His holy name!



Tuesday, August 16, 2011

This past month has been busy as I finished up my work with the children’s ministry at my home church. I am so thankful for the opportunity to work those precious children. I also attended my ABWE training. It was such a great time of learning and encouragement. The time was beneficial and exciting as many last minute details were finalized.

While I was at training my financial support came in at 80%. What an encouragement and blessing! God has been so good! I was also given clearance to begin my two years overseas. I will be flying out on Saturday, September 3rd. This next month will be filled with time with my family, packing, and goodbyes. My brother and sister-in-law are coming in for the first two weeks of August. I am excited for two weeks of vacation with my entire family! Then the packing and goodbyes begin.

I will arrive in South Asia on September 5thWe will begin teacher training and in-service as we get ready for the new school year; school will begin on September 14th. (A little late this year because of the Muslim Holiday Eid-ul-Fitr) This will give me some time to get settled, prepare my classroom and home, buy a whole new native wardrobe, and begin to build relationships with my students and community.

I am so thankful for each of you in my life. The prayers, support, love, and encouragement has blessed me more than I could ever fully express. God has been so gracious and faithful in these last few months. The date is set. The tickets are bought. Finances are at 80%. Praise the Lord that He is a God of details and order. He cares about the day to day moments and seeks Glory in each step that is taken. The gracious love of our Lord is at times overwhelming and always a wonder for those He calls his own. Oh, that I wouldn't forget these moments of praise and extreme delight as the Lord of this Universe turns his attention toward us and lavishly pours grace and mercy over us. Praise the Lord that in all moments He is God and has sovereignly ordained and designed each step taken.

In His Grip,

Jen Tarr