To Be with Him

I was walking from school when I saw their little faces light up. All the way down the street I watched as they jumped off the wall they had been playing on. With some curious onlookers, I crouched down right where I was and waited while they ran the distance of the street. As they ran the street my eyes teared up and I opened my arms. I laughed as they about knocked me over in their excitement as I hugged and kissed them. These were some of my precious street kids that I hadn't seen in several weeks. In that simple unexpected, undefined moment; I felt the love of Jesus. My heart was blessed as they grabbed my hands and walked with me; wanting nothing but love and attention as they talked a mile a minute. My heart smiled.

I thought of Jesus and the delight when we run to him with no expectation, need, or want but to sit in his attention and love. When we willingly and enthusiastically run to him; eager to just be with him. And I wonder... how often do I run to him for no purpose but to treasure time with him or do I only go when I have a request. I am thankful for His Grace and Mercy which overflows my shortcomings but Oh Lord- help me to run to you just to BE with you.

A Week In The Village

It has been an embarrassingly long time since I have blogged; which does not at all mean that there has been nothing exciting happening and certainly more than enough humbling moments. The problem is simply- time. However, now with hartals abundant, time is what I have.

The most exciting adventure of the year begins the day after Christmas. Krikkit and I were excited to get an invitation to spend a week in Mymensingh with one of our beloved Bangladeshi families. I couldn't begin to express the excitement, laughter, joy, adventure, and pure bliss of the week. Because my words just couldn't do it... here is an collection of eclectic pictures that might help to understand what the week looked like.

Yushea and his uncle walking to get another bus. Yushea insisted on carrying the largest
suitcase. After a while, when we started the mile hike into
the village it switched to something like this... 

We stopped by the school. It was the day they were reading allowed the exams
we were asked to sit right in the front while they read the results out loud in front of
everyone and then were sifted between those that passed and those that failed. talk about pressure!

we went to visit the school- Poppry wanted to see the 5th grade classroom
and well- here it is! This room for around 40 kids

cooking breakfast over the stove

we went to visit this girl on her wedding day as she was being prepared for the ceremony

Grandma looking over the rice fields- she is one of the hardest workers I have ever met!

Cooking over the whole in the ground stove. The food was always delicious
though not the most sanitary- I mean look at all the chickens! But I was so thankful all the
ladies let me help- although usually I was just the entertainment before the serious work!

Just Hanging out with the family eating dried fish- Yushea ate all the  fish head- what a shame (sarcasm noted)

I am pretty sure we held every new born baby in the village-
this one was just a few  weeks old- her mom begged us to take her home
with us to live in the states

Yushea LOVES cows! he thought having a cow in your home
was the coolest thing ever! and just didn't understand why his dad wouldn't
let him have one in their home. This house was half barn and half home.

Grandma taught me how to make rice flour. Women in BD taking cooking to a whole new level.
The women couldn't believe that I had never made flour before- oh Americans! But Grandma was so
sweet and allowed me to help her as she worked from sun up to sun down! 

playing soccer barefoot in the rice fields! these people know how to
play soccer! It was one of the highlights of my trip to be able to play with them 

we were pretty much surrounded by people 24/7. Here we were just
sitting to eat some fruit, which turned into a village show. Everyone  was always
wondering where we were and we were never without a crowd. Our first day it was suggested that we take a nap
we wholeheartedly agreed. what we didn't realize was that we were going to lay on the bed while
7 people stood around us and watched us sleep- 4 minutes later we were "woken up" to go to a wedding
- not my ideal nap! :) 

Yushea pretending to be a cow on top of a hay pile. Often that week  I heard
"Jen coatie? Jen Asho! Apni r ami goru!"
aka "where's Jen. Come Here Jen! You and I are cows!"

oh how I adore this little boy!
cows and all! 

and with many more adventures and moments to be filled in...

Sacrifice to Blessing

It's been a whirlwind three months since I have even considered blogging...so much for my new resolve to blog more frequently! But here is what I have learned these months. God is faithful and God is good, He lavishly pours blessing out on His children. It took me a long time to believe that my God; the creator of the world, cared so intimately about me... a sinner in desperate need of His Grace.

Somewhere in the last year, my heart changed. I began to cling to His promise and embrace the truth of His Love! As my heart changed I began to change...my time with Him became so intimately precious and rejuvenating. Going home this summer was treasured weeks. The Lord's outpouring of blessing. I met my handsome nephew, was refreshed in spirit, and was able to continuously declare who my sweet and Holy God is. I couldn't have asked or dreamed of more.

Now I am back and oh how precious it is. It is time filled, feet tired, and brain swamped moments and yet it is also joy filled, hope resounding, and love overflowing declarations. I have begun to realize that often times, the moments that I look up on as "great sacrifices" have turned into "great blessing." Some of the most difficult and painful moments have led to the sweetest and most rewarding endeavors. Coming to South Asia being one of them. As I boarded the plane for the second time I was overcome with the change of the second time around. The first time was sad, ok I teared up a little, and overwhelmed with all that I was leaving behind. But this time, I smiled as I anticipated what laid ahead. Knowing, because it always is, going to be much different than I expected (and it is). I looked with anticipation because the Lord has shown me that whatever is ahead He is faithful and worthy.The most "sacrificial moments" in my life have put me in a place to receive His precious blessing. So I look ahead....to whatever the Lord has.... knowing that when I feel the most "sacrificial" I am just being set up to receive the Great Blessing of knowing Him.

"Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it."   1 Thessalonians 5: 23-24

More than enough

It's one of those nights... too hot to sleep and the power is out...again. By 1 am you can only imagine all the different things that have run through my prayers at this point. From  honest pleas  of souls to be saved to selfish requests of mercy that the power would come back on. It's on nights like this ( and they have been a few too often lately) that I begin to ponder through the last year. All that God has done. How He has changed me, ways that I still need to change, and honest reflections of who I have seen God to be.

I suppose because it was the last day teaching my high schoolers this year, or because it's 1 am, or incredibly hot that I am more emotional than normal but I was looking through my prayer journal and stopped at the day I was leaving America. I was sitting on the plane and in my journal was begging God, "please, please... be enough." Don't send me and then not be enough for me. My pleading followed by the still voice of God saying... "I am." The longer I sat tonight and looked back I am so thankful to say that He is enough.  Often times we don't follow the Lord's leading or prompting because we are afraid that He is not going to be enough. I think of the number of times over the past 23 years that the Lord has prompted me to act in obedience in sharing His Truth, or in giving, or in acting in His spirit... and then  I stop... because I am not sure that He will be enough if I am rejected by the world.

But He is...  He is steadfast love, He is patience,  He is joy, He is peace,  He is faithfulness, He is hope, He is comfort, He is Almighty, He is ENOUGH... to forsake all earthly things for the sake of following Him.
He is more than enough....

A week with my mom!

I am Alive!!! It has been way too long since I have blogged!! I am far behind in every area of communication. Right in the middle of February I had a breath of exciting fresh air breeze in. My mom came to visit!! It was only a week but we packed every minute full!!

I helped out with our school's High School drama production The Lady Pirates of Captain Bree. I loved the time spent with the students doing som

ething we all loved. (outside of school... of course they love every moment in the classroom!) : ) On Friday and Saturday night my mom came not once but TWICE to the school's production! What a trooper! Friday night she came right from the airport. The kids were out of their minds excited to meet her and the three hours leading up to her arrival was filled with students asking when she would finally arrive every 4 -5 minutes. They came pretty close to being as excited as I was.

Saturday morning I took my mom to Hawkers. A market filled with western clothes that haven't been exported because of either defects or mass quantity. We had a blast looking at all kinds of fabric, bartering, and digging through the unknowns. My favorite moment was

when I asked the shopkeeper if they had more of a fabric. He said yes (with a head nod) and preceded to climb up piles of fabric, open a trap door in the ceiling, and disappear in the trap door

. Then down he came again with the material we had asked for. I didn't think anything of this until I looked over at my mom and saw her look of laughter/surprise. Oh the surprises that await in South Asia. I then took her to my favorite store called "moonshine" for some Diet Pepsi.

Sunday through Thursday I brought my mom to school with me. She surprised them with some special little treat bags. Sunday after school we went to one of our favorite orphanages. Monday after school we went to Aarong's where we loaded my mom up with souvenirs to take back to the states and had a delightful dinner on the Long's rooftop.Tuesday was a fun day! We had the day off school so we went down to Malumghat. It is only 60 m

iles away but takes 3 hours to get there. We took a tour of the hospital and enjoyed walking through the compound. We had a delightful lunch of chicken quesadillas with mango salsa. Ending the day with a trip to Heart House, a place where women who can't get a job; because of disabilities or being widowed, make homemade items. After a fun and exhausting day we made the trip home. Wednesday we had a wonderful day at school and my mom and I set up for our big "Snow Day!!" and ended the day with some quality time of my mom and I at an Indian restaurant. Then the fun on Thursday began!My mom and I set up my room to have a Mountain and snow background. We hung snowflakes all around the room and blew up frosty! Our final touch was a dvd playing of a fireplace. The students walked in to their first official "Snow Day!" We had coffee, cha (Bangla tea), brownies, cookies, chonachur (Bengali chex mix), marshmallows, and Games!!! The students did everything from make frosty, a modified snowball fight, and indoor volleyball; all to the crackling fireplace and snow falling. And of course it wouldn't be games if there weren't prizes. I think that my mom and I had as much fun as the kids!! We ended our day getting all dressed up in Sari's and going to a friend's wedding.

We ended our incredibly fun week with Bible Study, lunch, and packing. We made our final trek to Dhaka and had to say goodbye! I can hardly believe it's been 3 weeks since she has been here!! It was a whirlwind but blessing of a week! I loved that my mom threw herself into my life for a week and trudged through the Jet Lag to bless me with her love and encouragement on the other side of the world! What a sweet blessing of God she is!

Proverbs 31: 28 "Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.

Faith without works

It always amazes me of the power that is found when you sit before the throne of our King. No matter the turmoil that you feel or the distress that the world suffers around us there is true peace when kneeling before our Lord. As beautiful as this time is, I was reminded today of the power of our works. We cannot consistently remain in our quiet times with the Lord; at last we must get off our knees and do the work he has laid out before us. But oh how sweet and sustaining those moments are. It is the moments at his feet that give us the strength to stand up in the raging sea and declare His Glory with our works.

Matt 5:14-16

"You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.

ESV

James 2:18-21

But someone will say, "You have faith and I have works." Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works. 19 You believe that God is one; you do well. Even the demons believe—and shudder! 20 Do you want to be shown, you foolish person, that faith apart from works is useless?

ESV

Through our works the power and Glory of our God is revealed. Our faith is useless without the acting out of our faith. Do my works declare the God of mercy, grace, love, kindness, joy, peace, and power. The works that I do, declare who my God is... it is the proof of where my faith lies. I am far from a pure declaration of our Glorious God but how I pray that He will use me to bring himself glory. Each morning as I get off my knees may the Lord use the quiet to sustain me as He works in and through me in the midst of the raging the world. Oh my King be glorified!

Christmas....

It has been so long since I have blogged. Mostly because every time I look at my computer screen, I think, where do I begin? There are about 15 half started blog posts of the last month and a half. I thought that being here I would be even more inspired to write, but most of the time I simply feel at a loss of words to explain this vastly different world. All that to say, I have been a very bad blogger. But here goes the last few weeks.

I spent my first Christmas away from home. In some ways it was harder than expected and other ways easier. God was abundantly gracious as He always is and provided me with dear friends. We worked hard to carry on all of our family traditions here in South Asia. We did everything from Christmas movies, hot chocolate, matching pajamas, sleeping under the Christmas tree, making Christmas breakfast, stuffing stockings, and wrapping presents. Among our traditional moments we took part in the national traditions of Christmas as well including visiting homes on Christmas and going to church on Christmas day. I had a Christmas party for my 9th grade students. We had a blast and I had the chance to talk about the true meaning of Christmas.

There is something in being away from home that really makes you stop and think about the true purpose and meaning of Christmas. Without Christmas lights, Christmas music, snow, the hustle and bustle, the Christmas greetings, family, home, or the entire Christmas atmosphere; I felt that I had to strive harder to enjoy the Christmas season. For the first time I thought of the unromanticized version of the Christmas story. The fact that Mary probably felt lonely and scared. Her family wasn't with her, she probably barely new her new husband Joseph, she had just traveled hundreds of miles to Bethlehem. And I wonder if she wondered... where is God in the midst of this? Where is he? She stepped out in obedience to His will and yet everyone turned on her, she was alone with Joseph, and she was delivering in a manger. But God was there, right there with her. Never leaving or forsaking her; using her to deliver the Savior of the world. Oh how I pray that I would never forget the true purpose of Christmas. For the Son of God to come to this earth and live a perfect and blameless life. Fighting and conquering sin and temptation so that He could die on the cross perfect, taking on the sins of this world. Conquering death so that I might have a relationship with the father, be sanctified by the Holy Spirit and spend eternity singing His Glorious praises.